Twilight from another perspective
Jonathan Skagfield, age 21
Let me begin this post by stating that I am not going to tell parents to send their children to see Twilight (especially if your child is drawing pentagrams on their High School Musical 3 notebook). Neither am I going to tell parents that they shouldn’t allow their children to see this movie. Instead, what I would like to do is have you, the parents, question your reasons for either allowing, or not allowing (as the case may be) your children to read these books or see the movie.
Twilightis the latest Christian scare for many parents. Some think that if they allow their teens to read the books or go see the movie that the devil is going to grab a hold of them. This is a bit exaggerated, but it does make the point. Parents don’t want their children watching the movie because of the inclusion of vampires and the supernatural. Many parents will immediately quote the Bible verses that pertain to taking a stand against magic, and I think this is a valid point. Yes, we as Christians should not be practicing the dark arts. But does watching a movie or reading a book mean that we are practicing the dark arts? My immediate answer would be … well, I’m not going to answer that question because you need to make that determination.
As far as Twilightgoes I think that the use of vampires and the supernatural is a theme used to highlight intrinsic longings in the hearts of many. Edward is a great guy. He is caring, spontaneous, protective, assertive, etc. (Besides the whole blood sucking thing, he really would be a great son in law!) Girls have a strong desire for a guy like Edward. They want to find someone who is as good as Edward. It is Edward and his relationship with Bella that pulls a person into the story. The vampire motif is just a means to an end. Side note: Perhaps you should have your sons read these books so they can better understand what makes a girl willing to risk so much in order to maintain a relationship with someone like Edward.
The very mystery and restraint that shrouds Edward is easily seen in the classic portrayal of an international assassin or spy. The problem with these two motifs is that everyone is tired of reading about assassins and spies! Then along comes Twilightwith its new spin on what it looks like to fall in love, and BOOM you have women at work reading the books while doing collection calls.
Finally, many will still say that anything having to do with vampires is just plain wrong. Avoid the books. Avoid the movies. Stay away from them. Two thoughts: 1) The apostle Paul didn’t avoid engaging the pagan culture of his day by avoiding the presence of idols or by avoiding anything having to do with vain philosophers. In fact, he engaged the culture by using his knowledge of their beliefs in order to relate to them. 2) Do you allow your children to read authors such as Shakespeare, C.S. Lewis, or J.R.R. Tolkien, all of whom use magic in their stories? Stop and think of the authors’ use of magic. They use magic so that the reader will experience life in a new and creative way. We sympathize with Bilbo as he struggles to give away the Ring, for we too have felt this in ourselves. We have hope in Romeo’s struggle against destiny, for we seek to defy the odds. Finally, we mourn with Lucy for Aslan, for we too know Someone who went to die on the behalf of another. The use of magic enabled these authors to let us see life once more, the good and the bad.
Stephanie Myers, of course, doesn’t hold a candle to the previously mentioned authors, but she has definitely portrayed love in such a way that her books are on best seller lists. I would not presume to tell you to go read the books right now, or to go to the movie (it really is rather bland), but what I would suggest is that you prayerfully consider the motives behind whatever decision you make.
(Another review to Twilight can be found below, or by clicking the “older posts” option.)
I completely agree with the above analysis, but I have one thought to add- my biggest problem with it is that Twilight gives girls an extremely unrealistic view of love. The “love” Bella and Edward have is full of passion, excitement, and an acknowledgment of the beauty of mystery. Now, I don’t think that any of those things are bad (in fact, I think that without those elements, relationships would be squandered by arid ritualism), but I do think that when those elements are the ONLY part of a relationship, then the relationship will ultimately fail. Life simply doesn’t work that way. Love is hard, and some days it’s more of a decision than a feeling.
With that being said- I would also like to point out that Edward Cullen is PERFECT. And there are no perfect men that will be able to measure up with the standards that Edward is giving young girls.
Ok, so now that I’ve ranted about how girls will suffer fromt these books, I want to make one last point. The Twilight series is not the problem. Personally, I don’t care if they are read. The Twilight series is just a group of books, but the overwhelming feelings and the disconnection with reality that the readers are experiencing is what can lead to problems. I simply want to end by noting that the PARENTS should have more impact on the children than these books- because it is the parents that can explain true love to the kids, it is the parents that can point out the difference between the perfect person and the right person, and it is the parents that can give the children (especially the girls) the love that they desire.
K. Phelps,
Any thoughts on how a parent gets a child to appreciate their input, wisdom, and concern? Oftentimes, in a teen’s mind, the parents are clueless and irrational. I have a few thoughts, but since you strongly emphasize the parent’s role (and you are single, correct?) I wonder if you have specific suggestions?
Yes, I agree with you, that is a big deal. And yes, I am single and still a teenager actually (barely though :D).
Here are a few thoughts I have on the topic:
1. Parents need to be real with kids. Don’t try and make them think you are perfect or that you have it all together. Explain to them where you’ve been, the mistakes you’ve made, and even the mistakes you’re still making (this will reduce the belief that you have it all together).
2. Live your life in a way that lets them know that yes, life is hard, but yes God does prevail. But let them see it, firsthand. Don’t just tell them so and expect them to understand.
3. LISTEN. I cannot say this enough. In working with students in the southeast, the number one thing the kids always want us to do is just to listen to them. What I think is most interesting about this-is that they normally don’t want/need an answer to their questions. They just need someone to listen. I still find this to be true for myself. When I call home and explode to my parents about how I’m never going to complete my assignments for college, pay my bills, and manage a job and a social life-my parents immediate response is to try and fix my problems. I am happy that they want to help-but that wasn’t why I called. In fact, I find myself getting irritated when I feel like they think I can’t do stuff on my own. I believe this is because I am a member of an independent generation: a generation that wants to learn for themselves. This is why when I say to listen to your kids without giving advice-I want you to aid your children in an important way, while giving them a vote of confidence that says, “I know you are smart enough to make wise choices, and I’ll be here if you need anything.”
I believe that if parents are real with the kids (on a regular basis-not just here and there when you want the kids to listen) and if parents will listen to the kids and their concerns, opinions, etc. then the kids will be much more likely to listen to the parents’ concerns when it comes time. That was kind of long-winded, but I hope I answered the question.
I think Jonathan has some great thoughts about the series and I like K’s comments! I haven’t read the books but I agree with Jonathan that perhaps it wouldn’t be too bad if some of the young men read them to get a better idea of what the average girl’s desire is in a man (which from what I hear it is the gentlemen attributes about Edward that the girls are so attracted to!)
Just thinking aloud. Haven’t read the book - did watch the movie. Doesn’t it seem that Bella and Edward’s relationship somewhat mirrors joining a cult. The isolationism, the obsession, the leaving one’s family behind. I know many teens are searching (as are many adults, teens are just better at it), but I hope they don’t look too hard for a relationship like this or they may end up on a compound somewhere. Okay, maybe I’m taking it to the extreme…. just thinking aloud.